The MilSpouse Oral Histories Project

Oral History: Lauren Banks

This lovely conversation was conducted on a teething baby’s timetable. We managed to conclude before he exploded.

This week, we welcomed Lauren Banks to the Milspouse Oral Histories Project! Lauren is an active member of her faith community with missionary experience, a mother of two, and a milspouse of 10 years. While sharing her milspouse journey, Lauren reminds us of the power of faith and positive thinking, the importance of staying adaptable, and that there is no such thing as “too many books.” Thank you so much for sharing your stories, Lauren!

If you are interested in sharing your story with the project, send an email to milspouseoralhistoriesproject@gmail.com, or find the project on Instagram @milspouseoralhistoriesproject.

Oral History: Tisa Schmidt

Baby coos, loud coffee mugs, and calls from the school – it’s all part of the historical record!

This week, Tisa Schmidt, a behavior analyst, mother of four, and milspouse of 7 years, generously shares her experiences with partnership, marriage, and motherhood in this milspouse life, including how Tisa and her husband have crafted a life that grounds her and their family permanently in her hometown. Tisa walks us through what it takes to overcome stereotypes and personal bias, how you know that your person is “the one,” and what it’s like to share life and parenthood with a frequently absent spouse. Thank you so much for sharing your story with the project, Tisa!

Note: this account contains graphic language, descriptions of sexual situations and references to sex work.

If you are interested in sharing your story with the project, send an email to milspouseoralhistoriesproject@gmail.com, or find the project on Instagram @milspouseoralhistoriesproject.

Oral History: Margaret Reaske Robitaille

We have a wonderfully participatory tiny studio audience for this session, and the conversation gets a little emphatic at times. Prepare to adjust the volume.

This week, we unexpectedly delve into the first chapters of my own milspouse story. I am a teacher and historian, a mother of three, and a milspouse of nearly 13 years. Big thanks to Marshall Rogers for facilitating a discussion about my introduction to military life, including finding out what ROTC actually does, my adventures being Ranger School-adjacent, and our last-minute wedding with big rom-com vibes. I didn’t know if I was ready to share my story yet, but really, are any of us? Thanks for asking, Marshall.

NOTE: This account contains graphic language.

If you are interested in sharing your story with the project, please send an email to milspouseoralhistoriesproject@gmail.com, or find the project on Instagram @milspouseoralhistoriesproject.

Oral History: Kriszha Sheehy

In true Meet recording form, we enjoyed a lag or two, as well as some dead space for puppy management on both sides of the microphone. Thanks for your patience.

This week, we are privileged to welcome to the project Kriszha Sheehy, Army veteran, psychology research associate, and milspouse and partner of 8 years. Kriszha shares her experiences as an enlisted partner and a veteran spouse, including issues of otherization, gender stereotypes, and the question of when to participate in the FRG and existing milspouse social structure and when to just create your own.

Thank you for joining our project and sharing your experiences, Kriszha!

If you are interested in sharing your story with the Milspouse Oral Histories Project, send an email to milspouseoralhistoriesproject@gmail.com, or reach out on Instagram @milspouseoralhistoriesproject.

Oral History: Marshall Rogers

Part of this week’s historical record includes bulk trash pickup day, overly enthusiastic dog friends, and as always, baby coos and cries. Thanks for witnessing our lives in real time.

This week, we are privileged to hear from Marshall Rogers, an Army veteran, father of two, and military spouse of twelve years. Marshall shares his stories of transitioning from West Point cadet to second lieutenant, and reflects on his and his wife’s early deployments and how they navigated them as a married couple. Marshall also kindly reminds us all of our inherent value, and that everyone’s story is an important story.

Note: This account contains reflections of combat zone experiences, as well as discussions of mental health.

Marshall (right) on his first deployment to Afghanistan in 2011.

Thank you for sharing your story, Marshall! If you are interested in sharing your story with the Milspouse Oral Histories Project, send an email to milspouseoralhistoriesproject@gmail.com, or reach out on Instagram @milspouseoralhistoriesproject.

Oral History: Whitney Anne Thomas

This week, we are privileged to hear from Whitney Anne Thomas, a marriage and family therapist, mother of four, and milspouse of 15 years. Whitney shares stories from her early experiences as a military spouse, including the challenges of giving birth alone, making and keeping friends in the spouse community, and finding a sense of control and value in all the “invisible work” of this lifestyle. Thank you for joining our project and sharing your experiences, Whitney!

NOTE: This account contains graphic language and discussions of suicide.

If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide, there are professional resources available to help. Dial 988 or visit http://www.988lifeline.org for assistance.

In addition to Whitney, joining us for the session is her dog Shadow, and my 3 month old son, who happily weighs in on various topics throughout the session.

Whitney and her husband after the birth of their first child.

Whitney and her family right before her husband’s third deployment.

Whitney and her family while at a recent duty station in Hawaii.

Episode 3: The MOHP with Marshall Rogers

Expect fun and casual conversation between milspouse friends, complete with baby coos, A/C units, and very communicative dogs. It’s all part of the historical record…

Welcome to the first co-ed episode of the Milspouse Oral Histories Podcast! This week, the inimitable Marshall Rogers joins us for a frank conversation about his transition from active-duty soldier to an active-duty spouse, including what to wear now, the challenges of keeping it together for the kids, and the importance of us recognizing the everyday accomplishments within our own spouse community with something maybe other than a rose. Thanks for being here with us, Marshall.

Marshall, his spouse, and their two children at her promotion ceremony at West Point, NY, in April 2021.

Marshall and his spouse on deployment in August 2011.

Check back with us soon for more discussions about the multifaceted milspouse life. If there’s something resonating with you that you’d like to hear more about, write a post to our Instagram page with your ideas or topic suggestions for future MOHP episodes.

If you are interested in sharing your story with the Milspouse Oral Histories Project, please send an email to milspouseoralhistoriesproject@gmail.com, or find the project on Instagram @milspouseoralhistoriesproject.

Episode 2: Back to School Message

If you hear a jangling dog collar, an AC unit kicking on, or a baby cooing in the background, don’t worry – it’s all part of the historical record.

Hi, everyone! We’re still working on developing new episodes for September and October. In the meantime, please enjoy this short back-to-school message from Margaret Reaske Robitaille, the Milspouse Oral Histories Project curator and podcast host. Congratulations to all the military families who facilitated (or are in the process of facilitating) their kids of every age going back to school this month! Deep breathing into the new old routine, and don’t worry – the holidays are just around the corner. ::silent freakout::

Thanks always for tuning in and supporting our project. Check back soon for a new episode!

Episode 1: “Hi, my name is…”

Welcome to the project! Grab your hot beverage of choice and enjoy some conversation.

Hi, I’m Margaret Reaske Robitaille, curator of The Milspouse Oral Histories Project, host of the MOHP podcast, and a milspouse for all the exciting things in life so far. Please enjoy our premiere episode, a quick download about those nice four words we use when meeting new people, and what they currently mean to me.

Margaret and her husband at an Army football game at West Point, NY, September 2021.

Thanks for tuning in and supporting our project, and be sure to check back for new episodes in September and October!

Introduction

Hi, I’m Margaret Reaske Robitaille. Click Play to hear an introduction of the MilSpouse Oral Histories Project.

Welcome to the Milspouse Oral Histories Project! This oral history collection consists of firsthand accounts from military spouses, telling us how their lives are shaped by marriage to a military servicemember. The Milspouse Oral Histories Project aims to preserve autobiographical audio portraits of these members of a unique and often overlooked social group that is critical to the performance of the modern American military. These interviews also hope to illustrate the trajectories of, challenges faced, and choices made in the lives of today’s military spouses.

We are in the process of recording our first interviews, which we’ll post on this platform in episodic format. Our goal is to preserve as much of the interviewee’s authentic voice as possible, and some interviews may contain graphic language or stories that may be hard to hear. Any explicit content will be indicated on each episode.

Please join us as we meet new friends and heroes, add stories, photos, and memories to this collection, and get to know each unique individual as they share their experiences with us.

If you are a current military spouse, and are interested in preserving your story in our historical record, please contact us at milspouseoralhistoriesproject@gmail.com, or find us on Instagram @milspouseoralhistoriesproject.